I had once met a girl in a hijabi event. This girl was wearing a very skinny hijab. She was wearing a full make up, very tight clothes her arms were shown up to her elbows. At the first glance I said how would this girl supposed to speak about hijab. She doesn’t even know the conditions of Hijab.
When this girl starts speaking, she said that she was grown up in a community that no one wears hijab. Her father opposed her for wearing hijab. She said that when she decided to wear hijab her father forbad her from going out for three months. They were on a vacation and all her family were there. And they used to go out a lot. But she spent the whole vacation sitting at her house because she will not go out without Hijab and her father will not allow her to go out with hijab.
After I heard her story I realized that this girl had struggled to wear hijab more than I did. Although I wear a hijab fulfilling all its conditions but I didn’t face any difficulty in wearing it, on the contrary my family were supporting me and they were supporting wearing the hijab correctly from an early age Alhamdul Allah.
What I want to say from this story is that at the first sight I judged the girl that how could she speak about hijab, but then when I heard your story I found out that she is struggling, her life is not as easy as mine is. We have to admit that her hijab is not fulfilling the conditions but we are not allowed to form judgment on whether she will go to Jenna or hell and whether Allah will forgive her or not, accept it from her or not or even whether we are better than her or not because each person has his own struggle, but definitely we have to admit that the hijab itself that she’s wearing is not fulfilling the condition.
People are very quick in forming judgement about other people. When something happens, they quickly form an opinion, assume that it is correct and believe it. And so, make judgments about the doer. But for us –Muslims- what should we do in this situation? should he judge others or should he not?
A Muslim is different from other people. His manners should be different. A Muslim always try to control his feelings, words and actions, see why a Muslim should control his tongue. And we mentioned before that Islam teaches us to always say the truth, to forgive others, not to be angry and today we will know that Islam teaches us not to judge others.. We don’t know why they did this actions, the intentions behind their actions, the circumstances that they are in. And we also don’t know who is better in Allah’s sight.
Allah say: “O you who have believed, let not a people ridicule [another] people; perhaps they may be better than them; nor let women ridicule [other] women; perhaps they may be better than them. And do not insult one another and do not call each other by [offensive] nicknames. Wretched is the name of disobedience after [one’s] faith. And whoever does not repent – then it is those who are the wrongdoers” [AL Hujjurat 49:11]
So we don’t know whom is better. Even if you see that another person is doing something haram that you don’t do, he may be doing another good deed that you don’t do. Never fancy your good deeds, believing that you are perfect because you are doing them. And believing that other persons are less than you because they are not doing as much good deeds. No one knows how his end would be.
The prophet peace be upon him said: “verily one of you performs the actions of the people of Paradise until there is but an arms length between him and it, and that which has been written overtakes him, and so he acts with the actions of the people of the Hellfire and thus enters it. And verily one of you performs the actions of the people of the Hellfire, until there is but an arms length between him and it, and that which has been written overtakes him and so he acts with the actions of the people of Paradise and thus he enters it.” [Bukhari & Muslim]
Islam ordered us to forbid evil, how to reconcile between forbidding evil and not to judge others?
However, we have to admit that the action is haram without judging the doer. If someone is doing something haram, we will never know if this person is a good or bad person because we don’t know what is inside of him. But we have to admit that the action itself is haram, as what happened in the story previously mentioned.
Allah didn’t create us to judge others, Allah is the only Judge and He is the only one who knows what’s inside each person, what the situation that is surrounding him, and what his intention is in every action he is doing.
Don’t concern yourself about other people’s actions, be concerned about your own actions. Everybody will be judged alone in the Day of Judgment. Worry about yourself and excuse others. The prophet said: “If you find see something you don’t like in a brother, try to find 1-70 excuses for him. And if you can’t find an excuse, say ‘There might be an excuse, but I don’t know it.’
Whenever you see a person that is doing something haram, admit that it is haram, remember that you don’t know his struggles and you are not in his shoes, you are not better than him, and invoke Allah that He may forgive him and show him the righteous path, and also say the supplication: ‘Ya muqallibal-qulubi, thabbit qalbi ‘ala dinika (O Controller of the hearts make my heart steadfast in Your religion).”